Red's Wrap
Happiness. It's relative.
Category: Swirl’s Chewed Things
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Kisses
Hello. I am Swirl’s mom. Swirl asked me to tell you that his last chewed thing was a Hersey’s chocolate kiss. He had three of them, one right after another, white chocolate with dark chocolate stripes. He chewed each and then licked his lips.… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Kisses”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Oligarchy
Hello. I am Swirl. I ate part of the truck registration. It was meant to send a message. I could have eaten all of it but then they would think the paper got lost. They have all the things that need papers. Down with… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Oligarchy”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Naming Loaf
Hello. I am Swirl. I am so fine that they named a bread after me. I’m flattered. Truly. Still, I’d rather be called King. My litter mates were Challah, Pump, and Rye. They were named after breads, not the other way around like me.… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Naming Loaf”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Reports of His Demise
Hello. I am Swirl. I am not sad or woebegone. I am fine. My head is quite dented, I will admit. If people still carried pennies around, they could put them in my dents. Then whenever they ran into a gumball machine and I… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Reports of His Demise”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Self-Awareness
Hello. I am Swirl. I ate part of a Covid test today. Just the package. I got interrupted before I got to the swabs and all the apparati. Or accoutrements. I get them mixed up. I have eaten money and, you might be surprised… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Self-Awareness”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Legacy
Hello. I am Swirl. I can hold a paperback book of hopeful essays and poems written by very nice people in my teeth ever so gently until I can get to my bed to kill it. That’s how I would carry a puppy child,… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Legacy”
Swirl Understands What Tastes Great
Where and how do I start? Swirl. The amazing Swirl. I’d like Swirl to understand that wood is not a food, that he shouldn’t stand at a tree and chew on its branches, that digging for wood chips that are wet and soggy and full… Continue Reading “Swirl Understands What Tastes Great”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: The Economy
Hello. I am Swirl. I am being called money hungry. Maybe because I ate sixty dollars, more or less, last night. I ate part of another twenty, but I was too tired and full to finish it. It took a long time to get… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: The Economy”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Eschewed Beauty Products
Hello. I am Swirl. I am chagrined to say that yesterday I ate a lipstick. I don’t even use lipstick or any kind of beauty aid. For obvious reasons. I thought it was a white sausage. There are such things. I didn’t eat it… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Eschewed Beauty Products”
Swirl’s Chewed Things: Enlightenment
Hello. I am Swirl. While the people and the other dog were watching football, I ate the front and back covers of “Disrupt Aging.” I would have eaten the rest but it seemed indigestible to me. It doesn’t matter. It was being used as… Continue Reading “Swirl’s Chewed Things: Enlightenment”
Snow Door | wisconsinacademy.org
Listen to Jan read her essay “Billy” presented on WUWM’s Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “At the Breakfast Bar” on WUWM Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “The Parish Hall,” on WUWM Lake Effect
“Fury Cannot Touch Me,” Modern Love, NYT, 9/29/11
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