Red's Wrap
Happiness. It's relative.
Tag: grief
Broken and Lost Things
I wait for loss. I put my hand to my neck a dozen times a day to feel the chain that holds my mother’s wedding ring. The ring is gold and very thin. If it was thinner, it would be a strand of my… Continue Reading “Broken and Lost Things”
When Your Mother Dies
When your mother dies, you will take care of things. You’ll call her friends on the phone and tell them one by one that their friend has died. You will listen as they nod and wait for them to tell you stories about her… Continue Reading “When Your Mother Dies”
The Incredible Endurance of Grief
A gift-wrapped, autographed copy of Diana Nyad’s book Find A Way came in the mail today but I don’t know from whom. For a minute, I thought maybe I’d ordered it in some drunken haze but I quit that business a long time ago. Drunken glows,… Continue Reading “The Incredible Endurance of Grief”
Elegy Updated
Stand with 10,000 ghosts Hear their last words Hurrying to the river Running into the trees Shedding this life for new Drop your envy and yearning on the ground Nestle your love in the rocks’ mortar Be part of the wall that stays behind… Continue Reading “Elegy Updated”
Who Dies First?
My husband and I agreed that if the other one died, we’ll get up the next morning and take the dogs to the dog park. “The dogs will still need to run, right?” And the survivor, whichever one of us it was, will still… Continue Reading “Who Dies First?”
My Mother’s Face
After my father died, I found this photo in his bedroom. It was leaning against the mirror of the vanity where my mother had sat painting her nails in a room dark except for the small lamp, her red nails gleaming in the dim… Continue Reading “My Mother’s Face”
Elegy
Stand with 10,000 ghosts Hear their last words Hurrying to the river Running into the trees Shedding this life for new Drop your envy and yearning on the ground Nestle your love in the rocks’ mortar Be part of the wall that stays behind… Continue Reading “Elegy”
Broken and Lost Things
I wait for loss. I put my hand to my neck a dozen times a day to feel the chain that holds my mother’s wedding ring. The ring is gold and very thin. If it was thinner, it would be a strand of my… Continue Reading “Broken and Lost Things”
Book Mark
When my friends’ son died by suicide, I bought them a book. I can remember standing in a bookstore near the San Diego harbor, pulling book after book off the shelf, looking for just the right one that would speak to my friends’ terrible… Continue Reading “Book Mark”
Grief Note
In the pantheon of weird life experiences comes this: I just mailed a one sentence note to my sister telling her our brother died late in January. The gravity of the message required that I drive the note to the downtown post office to… Continue Reading “Grief Note”
Snow Door | wisconsinacademy.org
Listen to Jan read her essay “Billy” presented on WUWM’s Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “At the Breakfast Bar” on WUWM Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “The Parish Hall,” on WUWM Lake Effect
“Fury Cannot Touch Me,” Modern Love, NYT, 9/29/11
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