You Need to Move Over

There were three old men swimming laps in the area of the pool designated for walkers, you know, folks who are rehabbing their backs or doing stretches in the water, things like that. The lap swimmers are supposed to swim in the lanes designated for lap swim.

But the three old men, each of whom was tall and very lanky, flopped and flapped their way from one end of the walking area to the other. One had arms so long that his stroke mimicked a condor revving up to take flight. How could someone have such long arms, I thought, what does he look like when he’s upright? Do his hands swing at his knees?

The three old men glanced at the older woman standing quietly at the wall at the shallow end. She was clearly trying to figure out a place to walk between all the arm flailing and the old men were irritated by this, her placing herself in their way. I got into the pool right about then adding another body in the way of our ancient swimmers.

The older woman and I, also an older woman, started to stake out our turf. Because I am deaf while in the pool, I relied on my rolled eyes and shrugs to communicate my solidarity in her struggle for personhood in the walking area of the pool. We put ourselves in the way as much as possible.

Finally, I suggested to the swimmer with the freakishly long arms that he move over. He stared in disbelief. He may have said something but since I am deaf while in the pool, and he didn’t use interesting or understandable hand signals, I have no idea what.

He moved over, however, and in doing so, jammed up the traffic with his two flopping comrades which was truly exceptionally satisfying and so then I jogged up and down the walking area of the pool with my husband, who does not swim with his arms waving in the air and who has some consciousness of the automaticity of male privilege, and who needs to water walk to rehab his bad back.

When the older woman left, she smiled sweetly and gave a little wave as if we’d secretly poisoned the tea of the despots. It was such a lovely little afternoon.