There can be no sympathy for a blogger trapped by her own boast to write 100 essays in 100 days even if she’s driven to parse her own promise, thinking that 100 essays in 100 days could mean one a day or 2 every other day or 10 on Day 100, it makes no never mind because she said it and there can be no excuses even if all she comes up with on a superlative 4th of July is a ridiculous, queer little list.
This is what she offers tonight from the shores of Lake Superior in Michigan’s lovely Upper Peninsula:
1. It’s almost always better to eat outside unless you’ll freeze to death.
2. Buy the wild blueberry pie at the Methodist pie sale. Don’t be taken in by those flashy pies with all the meringue.
3. If you happen to spot a paperback book on your bookshelf that you never saw before that is titled The Art of Nonfiction by Ayn Rand, stop being incredulous as to how the book got there and start reading it.
4. It’s better not to get involved in the process of your husband securing the canoe to the top of the car.
5. Now would be a good time to finally read Lolita and to permanently give up on finishing The Goldfinch.
6. One dog is a household mascot. Two dogs are a pack. For better or for worse.
7. Public events, like bizarre Supreme Court decisions and the endless shootings that occur in one’s hometown, can drive a person to a place of no longer giving a shit.
8. No matter how deep the bottom of a pit toilet is, there is no guarantee that some creature won’t bite you square in the ass if you sit down.
9. The extraordinarily beautiful rock you pick up on the beach because you must keep it forever will look like a piece of gravel once you bring it inside. Similarly, 99% of pictures of sunsets will look like crap.
10. It is possible to not be in the world’s greatest mood but still have a pretty good time.
There’s the list. Just goes to show that there is always something to write about. So there.
#28/100: 28th in a series of 100 in 100 days.