My Writing Process Blog Tour

Most of the time, I do what I’m asked. That sounds like I am dim-witted or weak-willed, I don’t think I’m either, nor do I think I’m someone who should opine about my writing process as if I had one. But I will because I was asked.

I was asked last week by Elizabeth Marro to be part of what is basically a blogger chain letter in which a blogger describes her writing process and then passes off the ball to another blogger or two. I resisted doing this. The reason I gave Elizabeth was that I didn’t really know any bloggers to whom to pass the ball, the real reason is that I hate answering question beyond how was your day which, if asked by the wrong person, can catapult from the innocuous to inquisition level with just a raised eyebrow or a too expectant gaze.

But because Elizabeth Marro asked and because she has a blog that is so lovely and beautifully written with stories that have a clarity and presence that are so rare in the blogging world, I said sure in a very small voice and so I am here to keep my promise.

There are four questions:

1. What am I working on?

I’m working on this.

This started out as Facebook bravado. Why not put a bunch of blog posts/essays about being a mother into a little book and have it ready for Mother’s Day? A few days ago, I compared this to thinking I could make a great prom dress because I had the latest Simplicity pattern. Oh sure.

Challenge one is curating my own work. I figured that out of 420 or so blog posts, I would have essays standing in line to get into my precious book. Not so. Many of the pieces that I remembered as being so lovely and unique turned out to be junk – Goodwill T-shirts when I needed top of the line.  So it’s been a struggle picking really good ones and a few needed remedial work but I think I’ve got them selected now.

Challenge two is how the book looks. My commitment was to spend no money. Because I was doing this as a lark and not an occupation, I wanted to see what I could do on my own.  Unfortunately, this means that the finished work will have more the look of a craft project than literature. Because I think apologizing in advance for a product (like “I’m sorry I used the wrong ingredients and burned the casserole but I still hope you like it.”) is ill-advised, I’ve decided to give money to charity as a way to make amends for page numbers appearing in random places. If it was easy putting page numbers in a self-published book, everyone would be doing it.

Anyway, that’s what I’m working on now. On to other questions.

2. How does my work differ from others of its genre?

My work might not different from others of its genre if it had a genre. What started as an adoption and family life blog has morphed into whatever. Aging, living with a disability, feminist issues, death, the neighbors, writing challenges, my car – I write about what is impressing me today. I don’t plan ahead or keep a journal. It’s totally seat of the pants. There are other blogs like this but not enough for a genre minion.

3. Why do I write what I do?

I try to write about slices of things/times/emotions. Too many writers fall to the temptation to write the entire story of a momentous situation in one sitting and then the details that make it rich or felt are smoothed over in favor of getting the chronology right. I don’t care about chronology. I care about the perfect slice. This isn’t easy because as a writer I have to zero in on the physical and emotional details of a situation, slow myself down and dwell in the color and sound but not so much that I become bored. Mostly I want to write pieces that will stick with a reader; so to do that, I have to write pieces that will stick with me. The best comments I get are ones from people who’ve never thought of something from the point of view I provided or maybe they’re going through a similar grief or challenge and found a phrase to take with them. I want to hit home most of the time. I also write short pieces almost exclusively – 600 words or less – and often do 33-word stories. I am very much a fan of brevity in writing and reading.

4. How does your writing process work?

Until recently, my writing has been heavily alcohol-dependent. I still drink but not as much and I think my writing is the better for it. This is really hard to admit (worse than the drinking admission) but I pretty much do ‘first draft last draft.’ I write a piece and then publish on my blog or send to a publication all in one sitting. I edit on the fly; if something doesn’t sound right (when read aloud) or if there isn’t the right mix of long, short, surprise, metaphor, I make the changes right then. I never let anything sit.

My essays that were published in Modern Love (“Fury Cannot Touch Me”) and in Newsweek (“The Power of I Am Sorry”) were both written in single sittings inspired by events that had happened in the days before. There was an immediacy about both that made the stories flow almost instantly. When they were done, I sent them. Some edits occurred later but by editors, not me.

I don’t know if this is a good approach or a bad one. They say everyone’s writing improves with revision and mine would be no exception. I just lack patience and maybe the skill to revise what I’ve already done. That’s an area where I could improve.

So after all this very windy talk about my writing non-process, I want to pass the ball to someone who is more thoughtful, whose pieces are always beautifully thought out, and who finds the things in every day life that puzzle us and motivate us. Say hello to my good friend Rochelle Dukes Fritsch and her wonderful blog, The Late Arrival. The post she has up right now will give you chills and make think long and hard, “The Dumbest Question of All.”

Ok, your turn Rochelle.