Red's Wrap
Happiness. It's relative.
Category: Hearing Loss and Cochlear Implant
All is Well: Going Under
The anesthesiologist stood behind my head as I lay on the surgical table, then leaned over to introduce himself. He was not the young white guy who had slouched against the door frame of the room where I was being prepped an hour before.… Continue Reading “All is Well: Going Under”
What I Know
I know a lot about thisMore than the average personBecause the average person can hear music and can only imagine what it would be like not toMe? I mostly hear music in my head There are records in my headThey’re the ones I played… Continue Reading “What I Know”
Talk to Me
[Written six months before my first cochlear implant in 2015. Now, with the second implant on the horizon, I’m remembering how things were, how I’d created the world’s tiniest world.] I love my dogs more now that I’m going deaf. They’re not interested in… Continue Reading “Talk to Me”
Talk to Me
[Written six months before my first cochlear implant in 2015. Now, with the second implant on the horizon, I’m remembering how things were, how I’d created the world’s tiniest world.] I love my dogs more now that I’m going deaf. They’re not interested in… Continue Reading “Talk to Me”
Deaf Sounds
What makes you most anxious? One of the great charms of being deaf is not being able to hear one’s own voice. A deaf person can form words and say them, or think she’s said them, but is never quite sure that the words… Continue Reading “Deaf Sounds”
The Deconstruction and Reconstruction of a Woman’s Ego
It’s the part they don’t tell you. Your ego will go out and come back in again a dozen times during your life. And each time you’re flat and ironed out, you will somehow magically become robust and vibrant. But there’s no predicting when… Continue Reading “The Deconstruction and Reconstruction of a Woman’s Ego”
Sound Waves
You are what you hear She said, whispering, like smoke Wafting to echoes ________________ Photo by Stephen Hocking on Unsplash
Wordless, reprised
This is a piece I wrote a few years ago. It depicts as honestly as possible the isolation that results from hearing loss. I’m sharing it again because today I made the move toward a second cochlear implant and, by doing that, I decided… Continue Reading “Wordless, reprised”
Price
I laid awake last night thinking about whether to get a second cochlear implant. The first one was done in 2015. My right ear. It has worked well. It’s very functional. Bionic. If you don’t know, a cochlear implant basically replaces the cochlea in… Continue Reading “Price”
Booms and Echoes
There are twenty-two electrodes in my cochlea and this morning each was individually adjusted. I have been reprogrammed but without having to go to a special camp. I imagine my electrodes to be waving like tiny grasshopper antennae or like sea plants rooted on… Continue Reading “Booms and Echoes”
Snow Door | wisconsinacademy.org
Listen to Jan read her essay “Billy” presented on WUWM’s Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “At the Breakfast Bar” on WUWM Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “The Parish Hall,” on WUWM Lake Effect
“Fury Cannot Touch Me,” Modern Love, NYT, 9/29/11
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