Pizza Man’s Phone Manners

My husband is ordering a pizza and bread sticks from Dominos. He is doing this because for weeks we’ve watched commercials for Dominos pizza and bread sticks with dipping sauces liked melted mozzarella cheese and hot apple pie that look divine and so we have been talking about ordering from Dominos as if we were making reservations at a five-star Iron Chef restaurant.

He has been on the phone for ten minutes. I can hear the Dominos staff talking. She sounds like she is reading a new car warranty aloud. Now there is music playing. He tells me, lest I think otherwise, that he isn’t talking to people at the Dominos six blocks away. No, he is talking to a national Dominos Specialist.

The music is elevator jazz.

“She couldn’t be nicer,” he says while the music plays.

Several times a day, his phone rings. I listen from the other room.

“I don’t believe you’re John from Texas. Tell me what the capitol of Texas is!” The caller says Dallas. When my husband hangs up, he explains to me that it was another Medicare sales call from a call center somewhere. He gets four or five of these every day.

The phone rings again. “No!” he shouts, “I’m not interested in Medicare. I’m only 25 years old!” He is definite but not aggressive when he says this, but the caller almost always hangs up. I chide him for this, this weird new hobby he’s developed but he tells me the calls are part of a big scamming operation and the callers deserve to get tripped up.

Once on one of these calls when he asked the caller where he was calling from, the man said from “America” and so my husband asked him who won the World Series last year. I felt for the guy on the other end of the line – I don’t know who won the World Series last year. Don’t tell the old man.

________________________

Photo by Alan Hardman on Unsplash