99 New: Shibboleth

I thought of this today, like I do a couple of times a week. It’s something a woman said to me a few years ago when we were hotly debating some issue related to her administration of the mental health system. She looked at me calmly after I’d delivered my angry question and said this.

Assume the best intentions.

And I have, dozens of times, assumed the best intentions. I assume that people are, from their experience and their perspective, acting in good faith. I assume they are doing what they believe to be the right thing. I assume they mean no offense, no harm.

It surprises me, sometimes, how quick I would be to respond mightily to offenses, intended or not, if I didn’t have this woman’s four-word sentence in my head a lot of the time. I say it to myself, I say it out loud. It keeps me from reacting, from being critical and mean. When I assume the best intentions, I let hurtful things just drop on the floor like socks dropped from an armload of laundry while coming up the basement stairs.

So I share that tonight – this one little thing.

Assume the best intentions.

______________________

Photo by Alex Iby on Unsplash