Red's Wrap
Happiness. It's relative.
Fight Analysis
We watched the fight tonight. Mayweather won. It seemed inevitable after about the first two minutes. My analysis? Pacquiao’s arms were too short.
At times, the fight reminded me of when my brother would hold the top of my head with his outstretched hand while I flailed with both arms, unable to land a blow because I was too short. He did it as a joke because we never actually fought. He just kidded around with me. Tickled me. Called me Short Pants. I can’t remember a single time when he made me unhappy or mad.
Pacquiao, who also could be called Short Pants, was clearly the crowd favorite and with good reason. He looks like the friendliest, nicest person on the planet and his personal story is a winner. But it wasn’t enough tonight. Toward the end of the fight, Mayweather amped up the taunting, even pumping the air in victory before the end of the last round.
I don’t know enough about boxing to be critical and I am often a little overboard on decorum in all settings, ringed or not, but his celebration seemed over-much. In football, he’d had been fined. Too much dancing and football spiking. Why can’t all athletes be like baseball players? A ball player makes an amazing home run and he just runs the bases and high fives his teammates in the dugout. No making the other team feel bad because the pitcher put it in just the right place.
There were two phrases from tonight’s fight that will stay with me. Words that I know will have some meaning for my work or my daily life; I am big on sports metaphors although I often am not entirely sure what they mean. I’d like to ask someone exactly what ‘in the paint’ means sometime but it’s too late for that. I will just have to choke back my ignorance for the next thirty years like I have the past 66. (I am moving ahead with my plan to live to be 96.)
Phrase 1 was [to the effect] “You can’t hit a left hook with your right hand.” Remember I’m reading the captioning so if there’s some syntax error, I’m not responsible. Anyway, I thought this was very wise and certainly a keeper business-wise. I might use it next week.
Phrase 2 was [also to the effect] “He can’t fight him in the center of the ring.” Ding! Ding! Ding! I know all about this and the phenomenon of being on the ropes. I have both been on the ropes and endeavored to put other people there, usually unsuccessfully. The whole situation where a person can’t prevail standing toe to toe without backing the other person into a corner or on to the ropes – I get that. That one is headed for the everyday use category.
That’s it for Red’s Wrap Sports Talk. It’s all I know. I don’t know any more.
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Snow Door | wisconsinacademy.org
Listen to Jan read her essay “Billy” presented on WUWM’s Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “At the Breakfast Bar” on WUWM Lake Effect
Jan’s essay “The Parish Hall,” on WUWM Lake Effect
“Fury Cannot Touch Me,” Modern Love, NYT, 9/29/11
Thanks much, Jan. So fascinating and interesting. I didn’t see the fight, but I didn’t miss it. The phrases you noted are curious and, yes, prolific. I will keep them in mind.