Blue Smoke and Mirrors

This piece was written in response to an Open Call on Open Salon: How busy are you?

Hey, my young friends.  You need to learn.  Most people who say they are insanely busy are snowing you.  The ones who make you feel guilty – like you haven’t enrolled your kids in enough after school activities and haven’t volunteered for enough committees or taken on extra work for a boss who’s having three hour lunches – they took the Blue Smoke and Mirrors workshop that you skipped.

They know how to create the illusion of busy-ness.  They’re always late.  They come late to a 7:30 a.m. meeeting claiming that their earlier meeting ran late.  They’re checking their phone constantly for that hot wire news flash about some emergent situation that is way more important than whatever they’re talking to you about.  They cancel meeetings because of pressing business, schedule lunches three months out, Facebook post about how overworked and in demand they are, and tweet constantly about deadlines and new projects.

Their very pores exude a busy, can’t be bothered vibe that’s more pungent than an alcoholic’s the day after a serious binge.  When a normal person catches the whiff of the insanely busy person, they wilt, apologize, get out of the way, and wonder why God put them on earth to be so idle.

It is an art form.  Appearing to be busy when one is really full of bullshit.  I should know.  It’s taken me decades.  People think I’m killing myself with work and worry over a major project right now but what I’m really doing is sitting in this chair about to take another sip of Two Buck Chuck and look at my Lake Superior sunset.

This could be you.  Just listen and learn.